HAPPYness Project

A Letter to my College Self

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Dear College Self,

Hello to the thin girl with messy hair who fights her way through college life while being a mother at the same time. The journey will not be smooth. You will stumble and fall and make bad decisions, but you have to get up and redeem yourself. Here are a few things your future self (now with straight hair) would want to tell you.

Always BE GRATEFUL

When you got pregnant, I thought school for your is over since your parents were upset and decided to not finance your studies anymore. Thanks to your ex-boyfriend ( now husband) for putting the responsibility of sending you to school on his shoulders. He worked two jobs sometimes just to sustain your and your daughter’s needs.

Your in-laws, especially your mother-in-law, your parents, and friends all played a role in your life for you to finish college and land a job. From lending you money when your pocket is empty to giving you the moral support that you need, they did not fall short on that. No matter how high you get, always keep your feet on the ground and be thankful to those who trusted and loved you despite the hardships they had to endure just to help you.

Learn how to manage your time

It ain’t easy to juggle studies and motherhood, but it’s the way the cookie crumbles. There will be times when you have to bring your daughter to school because no one’s going to take care of her. It will be hard but it should not be an excuse for you to not give your best. Do not take a subject for granted just because you did not get enough sleep the night before due to your crying baby. Everything is new to you and there is no time to think how you can get through your day, so stay focused and allot enough time to accomplish what you have to do. This way, you will become more efficient and productive. This behavior can take you places and will say a lot about your personality.

Take care of yourself

Being a mother does not mean you should look older than your age and just wear anything you could find in your closet. I’m not saying you buy new clothes or wear make-up, but choosing the right outfit and making sure you look fresh when you go to school will make you feel good and boost your confidence.

Do not give up

Your patience, friendship, and relationship will be tested a lot of times. You will go through financial and personal challenges. Keep your eyes on your goals, especially your dream of giving a bright future to your family. Success is sweeter when at the edge of leaving school to pursue working early to earn money, you will follow your heart to get on that stage, get your diploma, and make your family proud. You will know then that it’s one of the best life decisions you are going to make.

Here’s a big hug and a pat on the back for being resilient and keeping your faith. Good job and keep it up 😉

Love,

Your Future Self, 8 years after your college graduation (aka Nocturnal Mom)

50 thoughts on “A Letter to my College Self”

  1. Oh, you remind me of my sister who decided to go back to college and pursue her dreams. She has four kids and all are going to school. I can imagine how challenging it is to balance between family and school. I admire your resilience and your grateful attitude!

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  2. Oh, your such a strong woman and I salute you sis. Like you I am planing to complete my inadequate grades and so that I can get my TOR and proceed to my board exam review. Being a mother while studying it’s complicated, I’m glad that you made it.

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  3. What an inspirational story! My husband and I are both undergrads who love to continue studying but are not too brave enough to go back to school, lol. We both personally decided to just help our siblings finish schooling. Two are graduating this SY. I admire you and your husband’s determination!

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  4. It’s nice to look back at how you were before and how far you’ve come. Lalo na your story since ang daming young moms who feel tapos na ang everything for them 🙂 Such an inspiration for them to pick up where they left off and be the best version of themselves.

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  5. That’s nice that you have the support of your husband and in-laws. I’m not sure what I’d tell my college self but for sure I would let her know that eventually she’ll be okay.

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  6. Oh wow. That’s quite the journey. I commend you for sticking with it, and it’s great that your boyfriend supported you and the baby. He’s a good man.

    Have you managed to reconnect with your parents since then?

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    1. Thank you for your kind words. A few days away from my delivery date, I accidentally met my parents at the hospital. I just learned that my mother had to undergo a surgery due to myoma. My father finally talked to me and told me to have a safe delivery.

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      1. Yes, I did not know! The best part is, everything slowly went back in to place after that meeting. It was not easy but my father forgave me and accepted my then boyfriend as his own son.

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  7. Such an inspiring story that gives me hope for whatever college has in store for me these next few years. Thank you for sharing your story!

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